minds been all over the place today, which is nowhere. i can't wait until i get evaluated because im tired of not knowing what's wrong with me mentally but knowing something is wrong. wanna go do something but there's nothing to do. nothing fun at least that i can do by myself. i'd have to make plans with someone and burden my mom to take me somewhere and spend money on me and i feel like ive been doing that too much. its already out of character for me to ask for what i want but whenever i find the courage to do so everyone's mad at me because they dont wanna do it. how was i ok during the pandemic, this is hell. well i wasn't ok, i just sort of knew how to cope with being alone but i forgot all of that. i don't wanna get into what's been making me feel alone tho because im trying to stay positive and not make a long post complaining! also i feel guilty whenever i sadpost now because i feel like im not as valid as everyone else, but ik that's just a me thing that i need to get over. and plus happy kiwu can accomplish great things ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

finally did something productive today even if only for like 20 minutes because i was interrupted! i started a sketch for something that shouldn't take too long so i feel more motivated to complete it, and even better i have an entire month so i don't have to rush